Goodbye Hello

Soon it will be time to say goodbye to the old Erotic Review site and 'hello' to the new, sprauncy and elegant one. 

In a couple of weeks we'll be launching our new site: this will create a different viewing experience: easier to read, with classically simple layout and effortless navigation. And relatively painless for us to upload to, too, which means that we have longer to write more pert, pithy prose and select saucier pictures for your delectation. All this is the culmination of many months planning and effort, so I hope very much you'll like the new-look Erotic Review when it finally arrives. We've already been testing it to iron out any bugs and I'm glad to report that already it works a helluva lot better than the new iPhone's Maps app.


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Going Tits Up or Balls Out?

Bruno is not amused by the recent Royal exposures


As someone who has frequent cause to mock uber-feminist ravings I am compelled to join those who greeted the recent publication of Kate Windsor’s ‘topless’ pictures less with outrage than with a sort of angry sorrow.

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Richard O'Brien/Huffington Post

Richard O’Brien, a poet and writer we have a lot of time for, has been saying nice things about us in the Huffington Post. Well, sort of. Anyway, he writes on “officially becoming erotic”, and his piece is witty and perceptive. So go and read it. Here.

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Meet. Fuck. Leave. Fiction from Danièle Schloss

At some stage, everyone must leave the party


When Priska is on the prowl, she fiddles with her hair. Her long, blond, unevenly-cut, wavy hair. It is her tool of seduction and her reassurance that all is still possible. I overhear her conversation with John.

‘I am not trying to seduce him. I’m leaving.'

‘Oh yeah, so why are you looking at him so intensely?’

‘Because I have a splitting headache, there are too many people, and the music is too loud.’

‘No, you’re trying to seduce him.’

John was drunk. Priska wasn’t and she was upset.

Read Meet. Fuck. Leave. here


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Who Are You Looking At?

Bruno has been sitting in the stands with his binoculars and a bag of pork scratchings

Doubtless most of us have been watching the Olympics on and off. Who has failed to thrill at the accomplishments of the beautiful athletes whose grace and dynamic brings a tear to the eye and a sigh in the bosom of the most cynical observer?

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Fifty Shades - the Real Life Version?

Having been less than complimentary about some of her Fifty Shades fellow travellers, John D. Michaelis gives author Sophie Morgan a grilling about her autobiographical The Diary of a Submissive. She does not flinch. 

JDM:  Your book’s being launched on the coattails of Fifty Shades of Grey. Do you have any feelings of expediency or exploiting the situation here or, dare I say,  ‘jumping on the bandwagon’?

SM:  I don’t see myself jumping on the bandwagon, so much as running alongside it, flailing my arms and shouting ‘it’s great you all know about jiggle balls and safe words now, but you realise we’re not all like this, right? You can be into this and find it hot without being broken or a bit mad...’ That said, of course the success of Fifty Shades means potentially more people will read it, which is very exciting.

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Robert Somerville reports: Gallic cultural pride has been reaffirmed now that the Crazy Horse cabaret has set up its tent behind the National Theatre. Vive la France!

Zoe loses her cabaret innocence at Alex Proud's in Camden but finds the experience far from painful…

Is this how you remember Jane Eyre? Literary vandalism, or adding "a deeper relationship and character development"? Zoe Apostolides investigates the new 'pornification' of the classics.

Christine Fears reviews Katherine Angel's new book on desire which, apparently, has proved most difficult to tell…

One of six post-Fifty Shades publication reviews: John D. Michaelis ducks down to view the underbelly of Dublin's BDSM and swinger scenes.

One of six post-Fifty Shades publication reviews: John D. Michaelis is intrigued by the idea of granny BDSM porn. Sort of.

One of six post-Fifty Shades publication reviews: John D. Michaelis shines a light in more dark corners of the shady world of BDSM

Vanity, revenge, loneliness, boredom, all apply: lust is one of the least of the reasons for promiscuity.

—Mignon McLaughlin, The Second Neurotic's Notebook, 1966
In Nevada, sex without a condom is deemed illegal.